Dealing with the ‘Psycho’ Ex and Cyberbullying

July 29, 2014 Opinion
my experience with cyberbullying

This is my first ‘slanderous’ (her words, not mine) post about my boyfriend’s ex whose Machiavellian scheme of abusive emails, slanderous blog rants and vilifying comments on social media eventually earned her the ‘psycho’ status. She then upgraded herself to ‘ultimate psycho’ status when we started hearing more and more about the delusional world she crafted to her own liking.

The vitriolic campaign she published online against Chris and his family was what unsettled me at first. I just couldn’t understand how a woman who claimed to have loved someone so deeply could quickly turn into a hateful, virulent bitch. But the hate speech didn’t stop there.

Then we started getting unprecedented emails from her, a constant stream of long-winded, disparaging emails found their way into our inbox. At this point, I was confused as to why anyone would waste their time writing essay-length emails to Chris whom she claims is a massive ‘waste of human life’, and me – a ‘disgusting’, ‘hideous beast’ with an ‘ugly heart’.

As hard as it was to stomach her condescending and slanderous messages, we simply archived those emails and went about our lives hoping that she would voluntarily stop her madness sooner rather than later. Boy, were we wrong. So… damn wrong.

One afternoon in late August, Chris received a phone call from a police officer who explained that someone had filed an incident report against us with allegations of harassment and cyberstalking. We were dumbfounded. And for a moment we even thought it was some stupid prank she’d set up because there was no way that anyone could possibly accuse us of something that bizarre. We were instructed to hold off any ‘provocative’ posts online, and to stop checking out each others’ accounts and we were told that she was instructed to do the same.

But nope. Shortly after that, we received yet another unwelcomed email from her insincerely stating that she regretted having to go to the police, when in fact she’s the one keeping this vitriolic campaign alive with her own two hands (quite literally). I’m actually quite interested to see what kind of evidence she could have provided the police because I know for a fact that I never direct any of my twitter rants at anyone. Oh well!

Chris and I had stopped reading her bullshit long before that so we knew we had nothing to worry about. In fact, we hoped that the crazy emails would stop at that incident report, and that she would heed the advice of someone with legitimate power as of the police officer. And sure enough, she stopped contacting us via email for a couple of weeks until when she probably got bored and took to Instagram and along came the Twitter attacks.

Social media became her next platform to launch her abuse. She’d create a new Twitter/Instagram account every time she felt the urge to chastise me. It was then that I was finally starting to realise that there was no taking the ‘high road’ with her. We knew that there was no way to reason with someone who was so immersed in this insidious fantasy world. Someone who would go as far as creating new online identities every time they wanted to channel their hate speech directly at another.

For some odd reason, the social media abuse hit a lot worse than the angry emails she sent us. I feared checking my Instagram and  Twitter notifications for a long time, and every time I mustered up enough courage to do so, I’d anxiously anticipated what horrible words were directed at me. This went on for about 5-6 months, until Chris finally initiated contact for the first time with her via email with which she responded stating that I shouldn’t bother even keeping a blog because my name was tarnished because of my ‘attitude’ towards her.

So with that unfruitful attempt at getting her to stop meddling with my life, and having made and cancelled countless appointments to see a counsellor thinking things would get better on their own, I finally decided that I just needed to see a counsellor  – and that is what I did.

Things have gotten better, but the Twitter attacks haven’t stopped. The most recent abusive tweet I received was an @ reply to my tweet regarding one of the rude nurses who were taking care of my grandma while she was still in palliative care.

Chris and I knew it was his psycho ex (who apparently works in a hospital – who knows?!) at it again, so he checked her blog only to find in her Twitter widget a tweet from her blog’s Twitter handle stating how much she ‘detests’ when people speak ill of doctors and nurses. There’s actually a screenshot of it somewhere on my personal Twitter account, but it would make identifying her a little too easy if I posted it here. Instead, have her fake account’s tweet 😀

So that’s what happened during my time away from regular blogging. Needless to say, she still browses my Twitter and Instagram accounts and probably still reads my blog too – even though she knows she shouldn’t.

I’ll be writing about why I think she’s emotionally unstable, and how she kept contradicting herself in the flurry of emails she’s sent us in the past 12 months next. But until next time, screw the cyberbullies!

Much love,

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